The Night After Halloween

 
      When you watch any lesser known VHS tape you need to throw all expectations out the window. We are all familiar with the Halloween franchise. Everyone knows that there is no sequel or spin off entitled The Night After Halloween. Well, after the great success of John Carpenter's Halloween the American distributors re-titled this film to fool viewers. Even the tagline states "They thought it was over, but the real horror began..." The funny thing is that its hardly even a horror film and it certainly has nothing to do with Halloween or the month of October at all. Snapshot or One More Minute is actually a drama/thriller with some horror sprinkled into it.

     "She's young, she's successful, and she's deeply in love- with a kill-crazed maniac! Our heroine glides happily through life, until she finds out that her "perfect" mate is indeed a carnal criminal. Not satisfied with merely raping and killing, this psycho takes lurid photographs of his helpless female victims (among other things). When she stumbles upon his secret den of kinky collector's items, her love turns into horror and utter desperation. She is the next target, and yet no one will believe her, despite her persuasive gathering of evidence. As time runs short, she is eventually lured into one of his more ingenious and lethal traps. Only the strongest will survive..."

   So that's what the back of the box reads when, unsurprisingly, that really isn't what happens in the movie at all. Our heroine has just broken up with her horrifyingly ugly ex who is stalking her and she never really falls in love with anyone else. Nobody is raped but the main antagonist does in fact want nude photos of Angela (Despite having a healthy collection of them already since she did a nude photoshoot.) and ends up going to extreme lengths for her cooperation. Another guy takes photos of dead animals but he ends up being pretty innocent.

    So what's Snapshot really about? Angela is an attractive young hairdresser looking for an opportunity to escape her controlling, puritanical mother. Angela befriends a young model who introduces her to a photographer with promises of a modeling career. Angela's first shoot is nude and goes very well. Her photos are used for a perfume ad in a magazine. Meanwhile, her heartbroken ex boyfriend stalks her despite countless rejections. A movie producer shows interest in Angela and invites her to his home. When an impromptu photo shoot gets too provocative, she storms out. But to what lengths is he willing to go to get these photographs? And at what point will he ex boyfriend snap? And is Angela a lesbian?

    Sound like there's a lot going on here? There is. The film can't even figure out what it is. Some of it is a drama about the struggles of a young woman attempting to break into a modeling career. Some of it is a thriller involving suspicious characters out for their own perverted gain. Amidst all of this are random scenes of pure horror such as Angela finding a severed pig head in her bed. I don't even know if they truly reveal who placed the head there.

     Angela's ex boyfriend is absolutely hideous! According to the movie they dated for nearly 4 years!! How?! Take my word for it when I say that she is a beautiful girl who seems charming enough. How in god's name did she end up dating a creepy stalker who resembles Frankenstein's Monster?!

How does this happen?!

       Another strange plot point is the motive of our deranged movie producer. We don't find out that he's even psychotic till the end of the film. He has a suspicious moment earlier before he's represented as just a harmless pervert and all but written out of the movie. Upon his grand return to the film he's now a presumably homicidal lunatic out for some nudes. I guess the naked female form will drive a man to do some crazy things. But he literally has an entire room covered in topless photo's of Angela already. So why does he need more? It doesn't make any sense.

    There is an interesting cast of characters at play here and all the actors are decent enough. If anything, it held my attention for the majority of its run time. But it doesn't have enough focus to be considered a good film. I didn't mind it but I doubt I'd ever watch it again.

31 Days Of Horror Final Body Count

  I just want to start off by thanking everybody once again this year for taking the time out of your day to read anything that I write. The fact that anybody values my opinion on horror films enough to read these reviews means a lot. I'm not entirely satisfied with the quality of my reviews this year. Many were rushed due to me having a very busy schedule this month. Hopefully you all still enjoyed reading them.

    This year was a good one for the Body Count. Last year I set a goal for 200 deaths. This year I felt as though I wasn't seeing enough people die. However, the films I watched quietly accumulated 253 deaths. I'm not entirely sure at this moment, but I believe that is the most deaths I've seen during October.

     Over this past year I've made no progress towards my aspirations to do video reviews for this blog. I need a new computer that can handle video editing software seamlessly. Until then, I will try to bring content to this blog. So bear with me. Hope everyone had a great Halloween and I hope you will all be back her next year. Thanks! Keep it spooky!

Day 31: The Exorcist

     The Exorcist needs no introduction. Commonly hailed as the scariest film of all time, it is without a doubt the most renowned and popular horror film I had yet to see. I'm sure everyone can relate to hearing the stories of your parents that saw this film in theaters or on home video during their youth. Nearly everyone who saw The Exorcist in the 70's was horrified beyond belief. These are lofty expectations to live up to.

     A priest discovers an ancient artifact linked to an ancient demon in an archeological dig in Iraq. Somehow uncovering this artifact releases the demon and it begins to possess a young girl in Washington DC. The girl's mother attempts several methods by multiple doctors to uncover the reasoning behind her daughters bizarre behavior. As the condition worsens the mother becomes convinced that her daughter is being possessed by a demon. She must turn to a Priest to help save her child. 

    So is The Exorcist the scariest movie of all time? While that's very subjective, I'd say no. It was perhaps the most shocking mainstream film to be released to date at the time. It has several gruesome effects, multiple gratuitous sex references, and deals with a ton of unholy subject matter. There were several films already released perhaps more shocking but none saw as wide of a release.

      The Exorcist looks and is portrayed as a very credible film. The acting is good, the effects are superb, the characters are fleshed out and developed naturally, and the cinematography is also fantastic. The cast and crew clearly took the script very seriously and it shows.  Despite its serious tone, The Demon's dialogue is littered with black humor that keeps things from getting too bleak.

     It took me forever to finally watch The Exorcist. The wait was definitely worth it and it was great to do it on Halloween. I'm not generally a fan of possession/exorcism films but this one somehow came off as something more. If I had to find one flaw (and there aren't many) I'd say the film may have showed its hand a little early. I felt as though the climax was about on par with some of the events that had already taken place as opposed to going into one final gear. I'd have loved to see Linda Blair escape the bedroom and stalk her mother a bit before being freed. But that's probably just the slasher enthusiast in me. I can't recommend The Exorcist to anybody because I'm literally the last horror fan on earth to watch it. We all know how great it is.

Body count:2

Side Note: Happy Halloween everybody!!! I'm posting my final body count and a surprise review tomorrow. Keep it spooky!

Day 30:Trick Or Treats

  

    Halloween is tomorrow and I have something special planned. So I wanted to get a Halloween themed horror film out of the way. So what better film than Trick or Treats, right?...Right?

     A woman has her husband taken away to a mental institution. Years later she hires a babysitter so her and her new lover can go out for the night. The child turns out to be an elaborate prankster and terrorizes the babysitter all night. Meanwhile, the boy's father escapes and returns home with plans for revenge.

      Can I just go out my way and say don't watch this movie? This is the definition of a boring horror film. There practically isn't anything horror about it until the last 15 minutes. Aside from the outrageous opening scene and a few of the pranks there is absolutely no redeeming value to this film. 

Body Count:3

Side Note: Tomorrow I will lose all of my credibility a horror fan. It's been fun.

Day 29:Spine

     Spine is one of the most sought after tapes out there. It's incredibly rare, SOV, and it has awesome Big Box artwork. It's the lone horror film released by a pornographic video company. I've been seeking for this ever since I started collecting. So was it worth the wait? 

     A young nurse is found brutally slain in her home. The only clues are the peculiar  wounds targeting her spine and the name "Linda" written in blood on the wall. More nurses begin turn up mutilated in the same fashion. As police struggle to track down the killer, he invaded the home of another nurse to torture her and her house guest.

      One of the things that jumped out to me with Spine was the acting. Yes most of it is your typical SOV "phone it in" acting. However, we find semi-star, Janus Blythe (The Hills Have Eyes) has somehow found her way onto the set of this Z grade production. Blythe is actually great in her role. Her facial expressions truly emulate the terror her character is experiencing. She actually elevates her torture scenes and makes them less comfortable to watch, which is the intended tone. Hard to tell if she was acting or just crying about how awful this film was.

      Spine wants to be sleazy. It kind of is. But it has very minimal nudity and virtually no gore. We see half a nipple (I'll give credit where it's due. Almost every review says there is absolutely no nudity) and some blood splatter. That's it. It's hard to stand up against some of the dirtier movies in the genre without those key ingredients. Even more baffling is that it was released by a pornographic video company but lacks pretty much all graphic content.

      The first half of Spine is filled with brain numbing dialogue. It's almost impossible to watch. It becomes a little better in the second half with a heavy focus on the home invasion. But at the end of the day Spine lacks the trademark SOV charm that makes these films endearing. It takes itself too seriously without the talent or production value to portray it as such. I can't in good conscious recommend this to anybody.

Body Count:4

Side Note: Even the Co-Director says that the only good thing about this is the Box Art. Damn.

Day 28: Prom Night 2

    The original Prom Night was a traditional slasher film about a mysterious killer stalking teenagers on the night of their prom. It's known as one of the better early 80s slasher films and stars the legendary Scream Queen Jamie Lee Curtis. Prom Night 2 is an entirely different twist to the franchise. Instead relying on supernatural horror and some light comedy.

   Prom Night 1957, Mary Lou Maloney attends the annual dance with her date, Billy. But she has other plans. Mary ditches Billy to hook up with with another guy, Buddy. Billy attempts to ruin her prom queen ceremony by throwing a stink bomb into the stage. However, the fuse lights Mary Lou's dress on fire and she is burnt to death! (You can't make this up) Thirty years later Mary Lou's demonic spirit is accidentally released by a young girl named Vicki Carpenter. Now Mary Lou's spirit is wreaking havoc throughout the high school and attempting to possess Vicki!

     One of Prom Night 2's  best elements is its colorful characters. Everyone is a caricature of 80's trends and culture. One could spend the entire film just spotting outrageous background actors. One memorable ones being a punk attending prom fully clad in studded leather gear. 

     The special effects are great! There are several showcase moments through Elm Street-esque dream sequences. Despite the good effects, most of the kills fail to be truly memorable. Most have a neat supernatural twist to them but fail to measure up comparatively to other 80's supernatural horrors. 

      Prom Night 2 is entertaining overall. It's got fun characters and some cool effects sequences. It fails to do anything truly unique however. Most of it's better moments can be found in the superior Nightmare On Elm Street series. Still, it  can function as a fun look back at my favorite decade more so than a horror film.

Body Count:6

Side Note: Michael Ironside(Scanners ) plays adult Billy. They show his hairline no  mercy! Even his teenage self is receding really bad. He looks like a 30 year old high schooler.

Day 27: Final Exam

     There are several college themed slashers: The Dorm The Dripped Blood, House On Sorority Row, and Splatter University are among some of the more popular ones. Final Exam joined their ranks in 1981 when slashers were in high demand. Panned by critics on it's initial release, is Final Exam really as bad as it's reputation?

     It's finals week at Lanier College. Most of the students are studying while the Gama Delta fraternity are planning their latest prank. Several frat members unload from a van clad in ski masks and stage a campus shooting. Everyone is horrified at first until they discover the elaborate jest. Everything seems alright. However, unknown to the students, they are being stalked by a mysterious man.

    So lets talk about this killer, shall we? This guy want's to be Michael Myers so bad but apparently he left his mask at home. He quietly walks around at a slow pace with a kitchen knife. He has the same emotionless way that he carries himself. He can grab an arrow thats being shot at him right out of the air. The guy even survives a fall that appears to be from several stories. But who the hell is this guy even? He just sort of shows up and starts killing people. Maybe he really is Michael Myers and he really did just leave his mask at home. The film offers absolutely no explanation for this guy so I guess go ahead and use your imagination. He fits the profile.

    Final Exam takes a lot of cues from Halloween actually. It is rather goreless but still has a way of making it's killings seem brutal and it's score during the final chase is a pretty obvious rip off. It's biggest and probably best Halloween influenced element is it's characters. Final Exam spends most of it's run time establishing these characters so we can get to know them before they all get cut down. The cast is all pretty cliche. We have the nerd, the jock, the frat leader, the pledge, and your typical final girl among others. Despite being your typical college movie stereotypes, all these characters manage to stand out. The nerd is actually quite likeable, the jock is one of the jockiest jocks in recent memory, and our final girl has a slight love story developing with the nerd. It's all good fun and games until the bodies start to pile up.

     It's got good characters and a great atmosphere. Utilizing several techniques that Carpenter did in Halloween helps. Still, there's no denying the genuine tension and suspense during key scenes. The final chase sequence is probably the best I've seen all month. It makes good use of it's environments which are actually pretty unique to the genre. It's not perfect(some gore definitely would have helped.), but if you're looking for a slasher film you wouldn't go wrong by selecting Final Exam. It has several entertaining moments but ultimately fails to really do anything to separate itself from those that preceded it.

Body Count:9
Side Note:Apparently this is referenced in Scream 2 alongside other college slashers I mentioned above. Also mentioned is Graduation Day. But thats a High School slasher.

Day 26: The Being

   When one looks at the cover of The Being, they'll find awesome artwork of some sort of creature and a mutilated body. To me, it seems like some sort of cash in on the success of John Carpenter's remake of The Thing that was released just a year earlier. Even the title seems similar. But this film actually isn't about an alien at all. Rather a monster created from toxic waste. It's any thrash metal band's dream scenario!

   There really isn't much of a plot to explain here. A mutated creature is attacking local civilians and the police sheriff tries to track it down. That's it, folks! That's the whole plot. I think their is some sub plot involving the banning of pornographic magazines...maybe something about potatoes. I don't know. The simplicity is almost charming until you realize that they need to put something worth while in between these awesomely cheese infested creature attack scenes! Which the film makers ultimately fail to do.

     The special effects aren't half bad. The cover art actually shows a pretty accurate depiction of the creature, which is a rarity for this era. There are some decent kills to be seen here as well. The best of which is at the very beginning of the movie. The monster rips a mans head clean off his shoulders while he's driving. The effect is surprisingly well done for this grade of movie. I've seen some horrid decapitations in my day but this one gets a solid thumbs up from me.

      The Being works as a film to watch with your friends, who preferably listen to Nuclear Assault or Sacred Reich. You're going to need somebody to talk to in between kill scenes. Don't worry, you won't miss anything important. All you need to know is that there is a monster on the loose. Watch it for pure entertainment value, don't go into this expecting a sci fi horror gem.

   Body Count: 9
Side Note: In a scene that perhaps makes this the most considerate horror film of all time, the protagonists are frightened when they mistake the noise made by the rustling of a house cat for the creature (Perhaps a low key nod to Cat People. Using a cat for a false jump scare.) After exploring the factory they're in and deciding they need to leave, one of our brave protagonists declares that they should seek out and rescue the cat before fleeing! What a couple of swell guys!

Day 25: Death Spa

  Last year I watched Killer Workout and it became one of my favorite films I watched that October. I discovered that workout horror films is nearly a fool proof formula. Hilarious gym themed kills, spandex clad women...and guys, and workout montages! So when I found another workout horror film entitled Death Spa my anticipation was at an all time high.

     Mike is a young widow who runs a local gym called Starbody Health Spa. An unnecessarily technically advanced gym. His former wife burned herself to death after a miscarriage left her bound to a wheelchair. Years later Mike starts seeing another girl. When things start to get serious, mysterious things start taking place at the gym.

      One advantage that Death Spa has over Killer Workout is the kills. All the kills are filled with gore and unique. We get treated to melting people, exploding mirrors decapitating people, mangled faces, and the all time classic blender kill. There is no shortage of entertainment in the kill department.

      The acting in Death Spa is appropriately cheesy for this type of film. Nobody really stands out aside from Cult Legend Ken Foree. Even he only stands out because of who he is. The characters are all interesting enough that it's not hard to invest in them. I love the scene where Ken Foree and Mike start tossing a football back and forth in their office just because it's there. It's almost as if Foree touches the football and some sort of instinct between the two kicks in. They exchange glances as if to say "We are men and we must do this." And then they promptly run a passing play in the office. It's the minor humor of it all that makes me laugh. 

      Death Spa is a great addition to the workout horror sub genre. It's lacking the Kung fu fight scenes of Killer Workout. But it makes up for it with a cool supernatural element. Supernatural themes play out best in horror films when it seems like anything can happen. This is true in Death Spa. This is as entertaining as they come. Highly recommended.

Body Count:10

Side Note: The gym in this is so advanced. It's not even necessary! There is no reason for this type of technology in a gym! It borders on Sci Fi at times. Also this opens with one of the coolest Title Sequences in recent memory.

Day 24: Frankenhooker

    Frank Henenlotter is known for directing the 1982 cult classic Basket Case. He's known for writing and directing films with very strange over the top premises. Two more Basket Case films and Brain Damage. Then there is Frankenhooker. Even the name is over the top and hilarious. You'd feel like you know what to expect. But there are still some strange twists added to this.

    Jeffery is a brilliant electrician who is interested in becoming a doctor. He conducts bizarre experiments in his home until one day his girlfriend, Elizabeth is run down by a remote control lawnmower. Jeffery collects her head from the scene and preserves it. After years of calculating, Jeffery finally comes up with a plan to resurrect Elizabeth. He must find prostitutes with the perfect body parts, kill them, and then use the parts to reconstruct Elizabeth so that he can revive her with electricity.

      One of the most surprising thing's about Frankenhooker is it's shortage on actual gore. There is definitely some bloodshed, but nothing compared to Henenlotter's usual offerings. Bloodshed is mostly replaced by explosions. Thats right! We have here a film that is full of exploding hookers! The explosions themselves are so poorly done that it's hysterical. These are some of the worst prosthetics I've seen committed to film. But that works for Henenlotter. He is a master of "So Bad Its Good" cinema.

    Another surprise is how long Frankenhooker is even in the film. Borrowing from it's inspiration, Frankenstein, we don't get any monster hooker action until nearly an hour into the movie! You'll hardly notice that an entire hour has gone by though as everything is so entertaining. Jeffery talking to the prostitutes and setting up his plan is hilarious.

      Frankenhooker isn't going to win Henenlotter any new fans. This is the director doing what he does best. Extremely weird Black Comedy Horror. Is it his best work? You can't really top Basket Case. But Henenlotter seemed to be pretty consistent with the quality of his B movies. You can't go wrong watching anything he's done. (Except Basket Case 3. That one just didn't do it for me.)

Body Count:12
Side Note:I also forgot to mention that all the prostitutes in the film are crack addicts. Adds another wrinkle to the fun.

Day 23:Cat People

      Cat People is credited with pioneering the False Jump Scare. Decades before the technique was beaten to death by the slasher genre, this B Movie created it in an iconic scene. This makes Cat People perhaps one of the most important and influential horror films of all time. Yet, it's hardly ever mentioned in such conversations and some casual horror fans probably have no idea what it is.

      Irena is an immigrant fashion designer who meets Oliver Reed at the local zoo. The two quickly (I mean QUICKLY) fall in love. But their relationship is an unusual one. Irena won't allow Oliver to kiss her because she fears that she will transform into a dangerous cat and murder him. Such is the legend of her native village. Regardless the two marry, but still Irena will not show intimacy. After growing impatient, Oliver begins to turn to his coworker Alice. Things start to become strange when Alice begins to feel as though she is being followed by something that isn't human.

     When you think of B Horror movies you don't typically think of something like Cat People. I generally think of monster films that are filled with blood, nudity, and absolutely abysmal acting. The acting isn't going to blow anyone away but it's not that awful. What truly separates this film from it's B movie peers is it's proficient use of suspense and serious subject matter.

    Cat People relies solely on suspense for it's scares. There are no monsters, at least none that we really see. This is truly Hitchcock like work. Few films of this era deliver tense, suspensful moments as well as Cat People. There are two scenes in particular; The bus scene, and the shadowy pool scene that are considered genre landmarks.

      Fans of your typical monster movies aren't going to enjoy this. There is a TON of talking and very little happens until the second half. It's in this second half where the film truly becomes a suspenseful horror masterpiece. Regardless, the first half seems to drag a bit. Which is odd since this is a fairly short movie (72 Minutes). You don't see very much at all in this production. But sometimes you're haunted most by those things you can't see.

 

Body Count:2

Side Note: SPOILER!! A lot of reviews I've read say you don't see anything at all in this movie. Wondering if they're either blind or watching something different. Though it's very brief, we clearly see a panther attacking the Doctor and Oliver/Alice at the end of the film. The other panther is still caged while all this is happening so it confirms that Irena does indeed transform into a cat. 

Day 22: Edge Of Sanity

 
    Everyone has heard at least the synopsis to Dr. Jekyll and Mr.Hyde. Everyone has heard of Jack The Ripper. Edge of Sanity is a strange combination of the two tales. The result is a very sleazy but well executed film starring Anthony Perkins. Sounds like a lot of fun.

    Dr. Henry Jekyll is a shy but highly regarded man of medicine. He is experimenting with a new drug he makes by mixing cocaine with well...another drug (Who cares? Cocaine is the only drug that matters here.) After accidentally exposing himself to the drug, Jekyll becomes the psychotic Jack Hyde. As Hyde he spends his nights in the rougher neighborhoods of London picking up prostitutes and eventually brutally murdering them.

    Edge Of Sanity has the technical prowess of a very high end production. It's not often that you'll see something quite this trashy display it's expertise in film making. The screen is filled with sex, gore, nudity (even male full frontal), drugs, and even bi-curiosity. A film of this era with that kind of subject matter is seldom accompanied by good acting, great camera work, and surreal set pieces that create a great atmosphere.

     Even though all the actors in the film are more than competent its not surprising that Anthony Perkins carries this without much assistance. We all know that Perkins can play a sexually repressed, seemingly innocent man better than just about anybody. So it's great to see him really let loose with the Jack Hyde character. The film spends most of it's time focusing on Hyde (Unlike most adaptions of the story.) There is a bit of over-acting but it works just fine. It's impressive to see Perkins become a polar opposite character that stands out visually while all he really does is let his bangs hang in his face.

     All this being said, Edge of Sanity isn't as fun of a ride as it seems. The story stays pretty stagnant for much of it's duration. Jekyll becomes Hyde, Hyde starts killing prostitutes, and he continues to do just that until the climax. There aren't many wrinkles added to the narrative as it progresses. One scene depicts a very nervous Jekyll being questioned by a detective, but that's about it. Aside from yet another great performance for Perkins' catalog and a lot of sleaze, there isn't much special about this. Good for trash fans, Perkins fans, or fans of Dr.Jekyll and Mr.Hyde.

Body Count:6
Side Note: Really cool effect early on involving a scalpel kind of scratching an eyeball. There isn't really blood, but everything looks very convincing and uncomfortable.

Day 21: Skinner

      We all know Ted Raimi, right? Younger brother to the highly successful director/producer Sam Raimi. We all know Traci Lords, right? Extremely famous porn star known for her illegal films of the 80's that depict her pornographically before the age of 18. And some of us might even remember Ricki Lake, right? Host of the daytime talk show "Ricki Lake". So what do these three all have in common? Well, they're all in this sleazy serial killer movie called Skinner.

     Dennis Skinner (Raimi) is a psychotic serial killer who skins his victims in order to wear their flesh. He rents out a spare room in the home of Kerry (Lake). Skinner uses his new found settlement as a base so that he can go find prostitutes to skin. Meanwhile a mysterious morphine addict named Heidi (Lords) is hell bent on finding Skinner and bringing him to justice.

     Traci Lords portrays one of the most unlikable protagonists in recent memory. She's nearly as psychotic the films antagonist and Lords' over the top performance really doesn't do much for the character. I can see the filmmakers perhaps wanting to cash in on the anti-hero craze of the 90's but this just doesn't work. Traci's face is covered for most of the film and when it's revealed she has a huge scar. She also remains clothed for the duration, which doesn't help her characters unwatchable presence.

    While Ricki Lake's character is kind of just there, Ted Raimi steals the show. Aside from one particular gruesome skinning scene, the only reason to watch this movie is for Raimi. He expertly portrays the insincere innocence and frightening madness of his character. It's a character type that has been done before time and time again. But due to his lack of support, Raimi shines regardless of the roles unoriginality.

      Skinner is by no means a good film. There is a serious lack of gore for the majority of its runtime. The director attempts to make up for it with atmosphere but is only marginally successful. There are several serial killer movies out there (Maniac, Henry:Portrait Of A Serial Killer, The Disturbance, etc,) Skinner isn't going to join the ranks of these highly regarded films. This one is best left for fans of Ted Raimi.

Body Count:5
Side Note: How did Vince Vaughn land the role of Norman Bates in the Psycho remake? Ted Raimi proves right here that he was much better suited for the role. Not that it ever should have been made regardless.

Day 20: Slumber Party Massacre 2

  The original Slumber Party Massacre was written to be a parody film of the slasher genre. It was written by feminist writer Rita Mae Brown to mock the misogyny in slashers. It ended up being shot as a typical genre film. The results had more humor than most slashers of the time. Slumber Party 2 takes the franchise to a whole new level of humor with tons of over the top subject matter.

    Valerie Bates is now in a mental institution following the events of the original movie. Her younger sister Courtney is now in an all girl Pop-Rock band with her friends. Courtney still dreams about the events that took place during Slumber Party 1. The members of the band plan a getaway over the weekend to have an unsupervised Slumber Party. After inviting some boys the slumber party is a go! Unfortunately for Courtney, she continues to dream of a new Driller Killer complete with a power drill guitar to shred on!! Her visions become even more real with each passing dream until people actually start dropping dead.

     Those who are looking for a plot will be sorely disappointed. Sure I just gave a synopsis but I'd be lying to you if I said I knew what the hell actually happened in this film. Who is this new Driller Killer? Where did he come from? Is he real? Why hasn't this guitar been utilized by every Thrash and Death Metal band ever? NONE of these questions are answered by the end. Does it really hurt the movie? Not really.

    Slumber Party 2 is so full of cheese, rock n' roll, gore, and intentional humor that it doesn't really need it's plot to make much sense. It's so entertaining that when it's all said and done you've had enough fun to not really care for explanations. I'm not the type of guy who rides a roller coaster and then wonders all day how it works. I just ride the damn thing and have a blast. Slumber Party Massacre 2 is a roller coaster.

     One of the great things about Slumber Party 2 is it's very thin line between dream and reality. Much like Nightmare on Elm Street (which was at it's peak popularity at the time. Coincidence?) Massacre tricks viewers constantly as to whether they're witnessing a dream or something that's really taking place.Even some of the camera angles have a strange dreamlike vibe to them. Characters are often seen directly facing the camera when delivering dialogue during a conversation. It's very unusual but it helps the feel of the film. This theme opens the door for a bunch of over the top moments. An enormous pimple that explodes all over the place and a rotisserie chicken coming to life spraying blood both come to mind.

    Slumber Party Massacre 2 won't please everyone. There isn't much in the form of actual frights. The killer is just a Rockabilly with a cool guitar and awful rock song one liners. The lack of answers to storyline questions is sure to drive casual viewers up a wall. Like a roller coaster, it's a short burst of fun that really isn't going to stick with you for the rest of your life. If you need an entertaining horror film to occupy your time, this is it.

Body Count:6
Side Note: I'm becoming more and more obsessed with band jam scenes in horror films. It always gets me hyped.

Day 19:The Legend Of Blood Castle

 

  Legend of Blood Castle (AKA Blood Ceremony) is a Spanish production based on the tales of Elizabeth Bathory. Bathory was a serial killer and is considered the most prolific female murderer in history. Legend has it that she would bathe in the blood of virgin women believing that it would preserve her youth. These stories are generally regarded as untrue, but that is how she is portrayed here.

    Blood Castle is a slow burn, low payoff bore of a film. There are themes of vampirism and blood bathing, but even that isn't enough to hold attention spans. It's another classic case of boring characters going through the motions. Liz Bathory seems like a fascinating character. But her portrayal here is so dry that she fails to draw you in. Ironic, since she spends a portion of the movie covered in blood. She has no charisma and nobody in the supporting cast could do anything to salvage this story.

     The Bathory story has been recounted in many films. Most famously in Hammer's "Countess Dracula". I have yet to see the Hammer take on the legend. But it's hard to imagine that it could be more boring than this. This was absolute torture for me to sit through. Maybe I have a short attention span, but I found myself checking my phone constantly or finding things to distract myself from the nothing that was happening on my television. The key to any good slow burn is to have great characters and to build anticipation towards your climax. No interesting characters and I really never cared what the climax was going to be. My advice is to avoid Legend Of Blood Castle.

Body Count:3
Side Note: I find the Elizabeth Bathory story interesting. Hopefully I can get around to seeing Countess Dracula and hopefully its better.

Day 18:Revenge Of The Dead

      When you look at any tape's box art you need to have some skepticism. It's very common in the VHS world for a tape to have absolutely insane box art with a movie inside that doesn't match. This was a little trick that home video providers developed in the 80's to fool people into watching their lesser quality titles. To some degree it's still used today. But not nearly as much. I figured that by 1997 most video labels had moved away from it. So when I saw Revenge Of The Dead I thought I'd definitely be getting some basic zombie flesh eating goodness. I was wrong.

   Revenge Of The Dead is about a young novelist who, after receiving a second hand typewriter, discovers notes of the previous owner. The notes refer to the experiments of a since deceased scientist who discovered that certain types of soil have the ability to bring back the dead. Interested in using this as a basis for his next book, he investigates the notes. His investigation has him cross paths with a group still using the research to run their experiments.

    This is a pretty interesting premise. But ultimately the script fails to deliver anything short of a mostly boring hour and a half. There are a couple of moments of great tension and suspense. But this film moves at such a horrifically slow pace that it's near impossible to become invested in anything that happens on the screen. Not to mention that the cast of characters are all about as deep as a puddle of urine. You can throw as many spooky ghouls and tense moments at your viewer as you want. But if you can't invest in your characters none of it matters and none of it is frightening.

     What we end up with here is hardly a zombie film at all. There are some reanimated corpses, but none of them have decaying flesh of any sort. There isn't much else to write about this painfully dull movie. Aside from some solid moments at the end. This one just fails to deliver enough to keep you going from scene to scene. Such a shame that an interesting premise had me feeling so indifferent throughout its run time.

Body Count:3
Side Note: This movie has a 6.9 on imdb. For an 80's horror film, thats damn near masterpiece status. I can't wrap my head around it.

Day 17: Bride of Frankenstein

 

 I shouldn't need to walk anybody through the history of Bride Of Frankenstein. This is regarded as a one of the best horror sequels ever and one of the best of the classic Universal Monster films. The image of The Bride is iconic in pop culture. Even if you haven't seen this film, you know what it is and you recognize it.

    Bride picks up right where the original left off. Somehow Dr Frankenstein has survived his run in with his creation from the first movie. Less unbelievable is that The Monster has also survived and immediately begins terrorizing the locals. A new mad Scientist named Dr. Pretorius approaches Dr. Frankenstein and wants work alongside him. His goal is to create a female monster to mate with Frankenstein's Monster so they can be responsible for the creation of a race.

    It's almost unbelievable to me that this was filmed in 1935. Everything about this film seems so ahead of that time period of film. There are top notch special effects, modern camera angles, and campy humor that still holds up to this day. It's easy to see why many people declare this film to surpass the original.

    The acting in this film caught my attention almost instantly. Every character absolutely shines and pulls you into the movie. Ernest Thesiger is fantastic as Dr. Pretorius. Even when he's doing nothing he carries a sinister aura about him and their something so hypnotizing about his character. Which is perfect, since he's supposed to be convincing Frankenstein to help him. Another actor who caught my eye is E.E. Clive. He's not a major role, but he plays the incompetent Burgomaster. Clive is absolutely hilarious in his role of his ever so confident yet completely useless character. Last but not least, The Monster learning how to speak gives Boris Karloff a chance to show off more of his acting chops as well. Unsurprisingly, Karloff delivers. He makes the monster possibly one of the most sympathetic horror creatures of all time.

     Sometimes when I'm recommending a film to someone they'll decline anything black and white. While it's easy to dismiss this as ignorant, there is certainly a disconnect there for some modern audiences. Hell, even I feel the disconnect when I watch some Black and White films. But certain pictures still hold up to this day despite this. Bride Of Frankenstein is without a doubt one of these movies. I can't recommend this enough. One of the best classic monster films of all time.

Body Count:6

Side Note: Took me forever to post this review because I was dealing with birthday stuff all day yesterday. Still managed to squeeze this movie in some how.

Day 16: Hollow Gate

For those of you who don't know, SOV stands for Shot On Video. In the mid-late 80s when VHS cameras hit the market, several independent filmmakers flooded video store shelves with SOV films. Generally known for their awful production values, horrid acting, and typically bad screenplays. You never truly know what you're going to get when you watch an SOV. It's part of the appeal. Hollow Gate is an SOV slasher from 1988.

     The film opens with a sequence of a father nearly drowning his son while forcefully assisting him bobbing for apples. It's no mistake, this guy is absolutely ashamed that his kid does not excel in the proud sport of apple bobbing. It's presumed that years of mental abuse has taken its toll on the child who now, fully grown still lives with his mother. Having developed a psychotic obsession with Halloween, he goes on a murder spree.

     Hollow Gate is completely self aware as of what it is. And that's always a great thing in an SOV film. None of these films should ever take themselves too seriously. Then you just have a bad film lacking the humor and charm that makes these movies so fun. There are tons of one liners, over the top delivery, campy moments, and just general silliness.

    All this over some apple bobbing! You can't make this up. But this is exactly the type of charm you look for in an SOV horror film. That said, there are still some pretty slow parts. This one is good for an SOV. It has a few decent and funny kills too. Fans of these kind of low budget trash films should check it out.

Body Count:7

Side Note: 2 pretty funny oblivious cop characters in this film. In the middle of all the carnage it cuts to them just having idle chatter and joking in a diner several times thought.

Day 15: Hard Rock Nightmare

     Earlier in the month I reviewed Terror on Tour. An awful excuse for a rock and roll slasher where the lighting was darker than the subject matter. I'm taking another stab at the heavy metal/rock n roll horror genre. It can't be much worse than Terror on Tour.

    The film begins with a flashback of our protagonist stabbing his grandfather to death after being teased that he is a monster. Years later he is the frontman for a local glam metal band (who all need to work on their hair game). After being harassed by the local police for the volume of their practices, he arranges to practice at his grandfathers country property. But things go terribly wrong when a giant werewolf begins to kill off the band and their groupies one by one.

Hard Rock Nightmare is the type of film you need to watch with a group of friends. There is tons of corny dialogue, bad acting, glam metal, and some funny kills. Other than that though, your going to need conversation with friends to pass the time.

  The good news is that Hard Rock Nightmare is in fact better than Terror On Tour. But not as fun as Trick or Treat Orlando the jury is still out on Rocktobrt Blood. Decent time waster, but nothing more.

Body Count:9

Side Note: The Werewolf turns out to be a really impressive costume. The mask even has cool animatronics. So good that it's strange they went with the plot twist ending. Oh yeah, there's a plot twist.

Day 14:Creepers

      Creepers is that absolutely cut to shreds version of Dario Argento's Phenomena. When I say cut to shreds, I'm not even really talking about gore. Gore scenes are edited but not that much. You still get to see pretty much all the bloodshed. This film has been cut by 28 minutes! But with Argento at the helm and an interesting plot, Creepers still manages to satisfy.

   A young girl is found brutally murdered in the Swiss countryside. Forensic Entomologist John McGregor (Played by Donald Pleasance) and detective Rudolph Geiger are on the case. Jennifer (Played by Jennifer Connelly), a young girl with the ability to communicate with insects telepathically, arrives at a private girls school. One night while sleepwalking she witnesses a murder at the academy. She gets lost when she flees the scene and is found my McGregor. After discovering her abilities he must now use them to help solve the murder case he is on.

    It's very interesting and unfortunate for the killer that he would cross paths with Jennifer. What killer would ever expect that? You're just trying to do your thing. You know, murder some girl. Then suddenly you discover she can summon an entire legion of insects that can basically tear you apart. That's a bad day at the office for any killer. It's one of those cases where your protagonist is pretty much more dangerous than the killer we're supposed to fear is.

     As with most Argento pictures, the band Goblin makes an appearance on the soundtrack. I'm a fan of Goblin's work but usually find it unfitting with the film material that it's paired. This time around Goblin matches the horror mood a little better. However, Motorhead and Iron Maiden are still here to totally confuse viewers as to what the mood is. It's sort of hard to hold anything against it though when you're headbanging to these legendary metal bands. It's sort of comical but you won't find me complaining about it. Shred on.

     Though it's edited quite heavily, Creepers still provides some quality horror entertainment. Argento is a master of creating tension and suspense. So the finale is as enthralling as you would expect from a great horror film. Throw in some good special effects, respectable gore, and an interestingly different plot and you have a film I'd recommend to any fan of the genre. The film has since been released in it's full form under the original Phenomena title on Bluray. So check it out, I know I will.

Body Count:7
Side Note: This film has literally the best ending of any horror film of all time. Donald Pleasance's pet monkey gets revenge for his owners death by viciously cutting down the antagonist with a razor blade. You can't make this up. It's incredible.
   

Day 13: (He Kills) Night After Night After Night

   

 The 70's and 80's was a pretty misogynistic time for horror films. There was a near constant theme of men killing women for being promiscuous. There was also a great deal of transphobia in these decades as well. As far as the horror genre was concerned, if you were a man who dressed as a woman you were a psychotic killer. Simple as that. Night After Night After Night fits right in.

     A string of murders is terrorizing London. The victims are all exclusively women. When the lead detective's wife is added to the list of victims, the case becomes personal. He has one suspect in particular who he believes to be the killer. But the murderer might be closer than anyone expects.

     He Kills Night After Night After Night, huh? Should have been called He Kills Maybe Once Or Twice A Week. There isn't very much stalk and slash going on in this early proto slasher. The murder scenes that do end up taking place end up being devoid of any tension, suspense, or lighting. It's all pretty basic stuff. Stabbing with minimal gore. Maybe a splash of blood here and there.

    Most of the film deals with the investigation and the sleazy going ons of the London night life. Fans of sleaze might be pleased. There is plenty of nudity, promiscuous sex, and striptease. The majority of the film is fairly boring. These scenes didn't really do much to spark my interest either.

     There isn't much else to say about this film. It's boring, tensionless, and goreless. There is a whole slew of trashy exploitative slashers out there.This isn't one of the good ones. If you like a little trash with your slash, I recommend sticking to New York Ripper.

Body count:5
Side Note: There is one cool part of the film. The highlight takes place when the camera keeps switching and zooming in and out of the killers face and his nude photos on the wall. I love cheesy/trippy cinematography like that.

Day 12: Demon Of Paradise

 

  I have an unusual opinion when it comes to Universal Monster Films. My absolute favorite Universal monster is The Creature From The Black Lagoon by a mile. It's not even close. For a long time I've watched as all the other Universal Monsters have seen updates and remakes while The Creature watched from the sidelines. He gets an updated look in The Monster Squad (and looks incredible!) but has never been the focus of a film since his initial run in the 50's. Demon Of Paradise's cover seems to promise a sort of Creature From The Black Lagoon rip off. It sort of is.

       When Islander's begin an illegal dynamite trade the explosions awaken an ancient Lizard Man Creature. Angered by the disturbance, the creature begins to attack Islanders and seemingly causes explosions literally everywhere he goes. A reptile expert and the local sheriff team up to investigate while a desperate resort owner uses the attention to draw tourists.

      There are two things to take away from this film. An absolutely awful creature suit and explosions. Lots of explosions. Practically every scene ends with an explosion. There is literally a scene where the creature leaps from the water, grabs a helicopter, PULLS IT INTO THE WATER, and then of course it explodes. There are other kills, but they aren't memorable at all. The explosions steal the show and are the only entertainment value the film has.

      It's claimed that you can easily see the zipper on the Creature From The Black Lagoon's suit. I've never seen it, and to me that is one of the best creature suits ever. Even still, seeing how it was brought to the next level in Monster Squad, I've always wanted to see what an update creature suit would be like. The creature on the cover of this tape looks awesome. The creature seen in the film? Well to say it looks crappy would be an understatement. It only has redeeming value for it's comedic appearance.

      There isn't much reason to go out of your way to watch Demon Of Paradise. There's pretty much no gore, the creature appearances are mostly short and spread out, and there's a lot of bad dialogue. There's a goofy monster egg hunt, one nude scene, and explosions. Did I mention that there are explosions? If you need to see a ton of explosions, look away from your action films and check out Demon Of Paradise.

Body Count: 13
Side note: Guess how the creature dies. You guessed it! Explosion!

Day 11: Zombie High

   

 I haven't reviewed a zombie movie yet this month. So I decided to slide ol' Zombie High into the VCR. Of course, Zombie High doesn't have the type of zombies we've come to expect since the release of Night Of The Living Dead. Instead of flesh eating corpses we see people still very much alive, but under the control of others. So since they aren't dead I guess they aren't zombies at all. They just kind of act like zombies at times. Also, the film appears to take place in college. Pretty deceitful title.

    Andrea has just been accepted into a prestigious college attended mostly by rich preppies. Her boyfriend, who appears to still be in high school, isn't too happy about his girlfriends college venture. Not helping matters is the professor that seemingly has the hots for young Andrea. Amidst all of this, Andrea begins to notice that the student's are all behaving strangely. The professors seem to be brainwashing and controlling all of their students.

    There seems to be some sort of message about conformity to this film. One of the main male characters is a rebellious punk rocker being forced into the Academy by his politician father. Early on into the film he is captured and brain washed to become just like the other "preppies". There is a sub plot about how all the brain washed graduates go on to have successful careers as judges, lawyers, or politicians. So these brainwashed kids would actually effect society. They're being controlled by radio wave that constantly loops classical music. Not to fear! The power of Rock N' Roll prevails when the classical tape is replaced by "Kiss My Butt"! A rock smash hit that sounds all too familiar (It's a carbon copy of Fight For Your Right by Beastie Boys).

   There are large dull patches in this generally goreless and completely clothed film. Even still, Zombie High manages a couple of stand out entertaining moments. There is a hilarious scene with a Funk band playing the school dance. The zombies are attempting to dance but they can't because they're quite emotionless and have no apparent rhythm. Also worth checking out is the professors rapidly aging and dying at the films climax.

    Aside from a few moments and some campy dialogue, Zombie High is still pretty forgettable. It moves kind of slowly and the finale seems rushed. We don't even know the fate of certain major characters and other's just aren't explained. This is good for a laugh or two, but don't go out of your way to see it.

Body Count:2
Side Note: One of the supporting female characters is played by Sherilyn Fenn, who played Audrey Horne on Twin Peaks.

Day 10: Slashdance

   

 Ah, the 80's! When most people look back it's hard not to think of dancing in spandex and sweatbands. Films like Flashdance really popularized this cheesy 80's style of dancing. Just like anything else that was the least bit relevant in pop-culture, it was only a matter of time before the slasher genre tried to cash in.

      Young beautiful women who audition at a small Hollywood theater are going missing. Tori Raines (played by Cindy Maranne/Ferda. She actually was a professional wrestler for the GLOW promotion under the ring name Americana.) is a tough as nails police officer known for her undercover work. After busting steroid dealers and some skinheads who mug the homeless, she is called onto the missing dancers case. Going undercover once again, she poses as a dancer in the play to get closer to her suspect.

      You can't expect much terror from a film titled "Slashdance". You don't get much either, this slasher is as campy as they come. Everything is literally dripping with cheese. The police captain is a complete narcissist, steroid dealers act like female pro wrestlers (They probably were), and Tori has no probably drop kicking any criminal she crosses paths with. Detective Raines even has a tragic backstory that haunts her throughout the film but has absolutely no significance to the plot. And when I say tragic, I mean literally everything bad that could happen to her family has happened. Her audio only flashbacks are as eyeball rolling yet hysterical as it gets.

     So all of this sounds like a lot of fun. Hey I'm a fan of some camp with my horror. The main problem is that there is very little horror. We get two scenes of stalk and slash, one accidental suicide, a shooting, and a pathetic excuse for a final chase scene. Meanwhile, the killer becomes all but forgotten in the middle portion of the film while Raines dances away with her fellow cast members over and over and over again. The plus side to all of this is that all the girls are beautiful. Most of the supporting cast were roster members of GLOW and they look incredible in spandex.

      Slashdance has all the makings for a fantastic SOV slasher flick: An awesomely terrible CGI Knife title card, over the top acting, more awful dialogue than actual slashing, and minor celebrities in starring roles. It however, is not SOV. The production value appears pretty decent actually. This film can be a ton of fun with a few friends. Just don't expect much tension or suspense.

Body count:5
Side Note: GLOW stands for Gorgeous Ladies Of Wrestling and began in 1986. It has been revived and continues to this day. This film could be fun for fans of the promotion.

Day 9: Terror On Tour

 

  In the early 80's the slasher genre was in full swing. Several sub-genres of the already sub-genre were born. One of the most beloved is the Rock n' Roll/Heavy Metal Slasher. Though short lived, this sub genre brought us the much sought after Rocktober Blood. Unfortunately it also brought us Terror On Tour.

     The Clowns are a rock group (portrayed by actual rock band, The Names) that dress in ridiculous leotards, clown makeup, and giant afro wigs. Their stage show involves fake stabbings and mannequin mutilation. While on tour, a series of murders begins to follow the band where ever they go. Someone is dressing up like one of the clowns and using their obvious afro driven sex appeal to lure groupies to their death.

      The weakest point of Terror on Tour is the characters. The Clowns themselves are party animal sex fiends when in full makeup. But by day they turn into some of the most boring unrecognizable characters in slasher history. Not that they're recognizable in makeup since they all do it completely identical (Which helps the murder mystery, but hinders the band mates from standing out.) The supporting cast isn't much better. I'm not joking when I say I had to look through several reviews post-viewing to even find out who the killer was. Even most of the reviews had no idea who the killer was despite him being revealed in the films climax. The light was so poor and the characters all look so similar that it was hard to tell. They're also so bland that it's hard to care. (SPOILER:I guess it's the band manager played by Larry Thomas, the Seinfeld "Soup Nazi")

       From a gore standpoint there isn't much to see here. Pretty much all the kills are your ordinary stabbings. There is one throat slit with a passable wound effect. But other than that we have your average trick knife and buckets of blood thrown at the wall type of thing. There are a couple of reasons to MAYBE subject yourself to this movie but the bloodshed isn't one of them.

     While this sounds like it's the synopsis of perhaps one of the most entertaining slasher films ever, it's not. Could it have been? Perhaps. But lack of decent gore, poor dialogue, bland characters, bad lighting, and a slow pace keep these clowns from delivering the goods. There is some entertainment here though. The acting is so bad that it's good and some of the lines are pretty hilarious. This would probably be fun viewing with a few friends.

Body Count:8
Side Note: The music by The Names isn't bad. It's catchy but pretty unmemorable. Also watch out for the absurd ending to the film, it just kinda....ends.

Day 8: Misery

     It's embarrassing to me that I'm running a blog where I predominantly talk about horror films and that I'm just getting around to seeing this. Needless to say, after watching B movie after B movie it's pretty easy to invest emotionally into a major production that many consider a classic. Misery did not disappoint.

     Paul Sheldon is the author of a series of romance novels focused on a female character named Misery. Wanting to move on to different work, Paul has written a draft for a brand new novel. When taking a trip back to his home, Paul is caught in a blizzard and drives his car off the road. Paul is discovered by Annie Wilkes, who brings him back to her home and nurses him back to health though both of his legs are severely broken. Annie claims to be Paul's number 1 fan, but she shows signs of instability. Annie reads Paul's latest book and discovers that he has killed off the Misery character. Enraged, Annie forces the crippled Paul to write a new book keeping Misery alive. Paul must now play along in order to stay alive.

     Misery is as deliberately paced as you would expect any film about a crippled man trapped in a house would be. But the slow pacing does nothing to take away from the tension. Each scene slowly builds and builds the tension within the house until everything explodes in one of the better climactic confrontations you can expect from these types of thrillers.

    The acting is exceptional across the board. Kathy Bates' (who I recognize from The Office) performance launches Annie Wilkes into the stratosphere of most frightening horror characters ever in cinema. She deservedly won an Oscar for her work on this film. James Caan's portrayal of the talented author is very believable. Because of how well the two play off of each other it becomes near impossible not to empathize with Caan. The final scene revealing that he may never escape the fear of Annie is perhaps more haunting than his actual predicament.

    Misery is an extremely effective horror-thriller boosted by strong performances and great direction. There are even surprising scenes of gore so even the gorehounds can quench their thirst as well. Most people reading this review have probably already seen it. But if you haven't, make sure you look into this one.

Body Count: 2
Side note: Will I ever be able to look at Jo Bennett the same again?